BTG 97 - No Respect

Hello and welcome to breaking the guard. On today's episode, I'm going to talk about respect and particularly not getting any. And uh you might be thinking, oh, is David feeling slighted? It's no, the opposite. me not giving respect to other people and how it's bit me in the butt. I feel this uh will be a good lesson for people coming up and maybe give some light to why people don't tap or you know they go beyond the tap. So this just happened to me like just a week ago or so. I was training and I kept doing a very similar sweep, which is I think I even showed it. It was an octopus sweep uh or reverse seat belt, cat dog, whatever you want to call it, where you hook the leg and then you bump them over. you partially expose your back, but normally the angle that you give uh for the opponent is not sufficient to lock on a real naked choke. And I had the same training partner who would repeatedly go for the rear naked choke and wouldn't be able to finish. I would complete the sweep and maybe a couple two maybe even three times where the same sequence happened to the point where I became very confident that it was not possible to finish the choke from that angle and uh whenever he would go for it I would almost let it happen. So then I would just score the sweep and finish. So, unfortunately for me, one of these times I ended up waking up and uh we were both confused. I don't I'm not sure the sequence of events because he was kind of shocked also. I'm not sure if he realized I went out or maybe I did escape but I passed out in the process. I'm not really sure. I just knew that I came too and then I was looking at him and then like I went out and uh some learning lessons from there. It was one always respect the submission. Um even when you feel that the submission is weak or maybe it's not plausible should always be respected. Uh I've made this mistake twice in training actually. I know two separate times where I was playing with a position that I felt overly confident in and then ended up waking up looking at the ceiling. not great, right? Uh and I also think it's reckless in the sense that I've put my life in someone else's hands and putting them in a position where if something, god forbid, were to happen to me, they're not going to live with feeling guilty when they really shouldn't, that was all my fault, right? Um but in this case, this wasn't like an ego thing. I would have happily tapped. I just never had the thought to tap. Right? And you might be thinking, how's that even possible? Like don't you feel that you're getting constricted or like your the lights are going off? Uh in this case, I didn't. All right. Uh the last thing and again you when you go unconscious you get a little bit of amnesia so it's kind of hard to uh remember everything with 100% detail but I remember scoring the sweep and then feeling oh this is kind of tight and I believe in the process I was trying to twist out of it and uh I think maybe that made it worse and uh maybe that's when I went unconscious. Not too sure. But in either case, I shouldn't have been so nonchalant about it, right? Like in my mind, I just didn't see it was a possibility. So, it never even registered the the thought to tap. Like similarly, the other time where I was goofing around and training and I went unconscious, similar situation where I was playing around uh it was like one of my students, he was a white belt. I had him on my back and I was doing like different like counters and goofy like submissions like going for the toe holds and stuff like that and he ended up blocking a rear naked choke and putting me to sleep and I never even thought to tap because I was so comfortable that I never even acknowledged that it was a threat. And obviously that's embarrassing, right? Like getting tapped out by one of your own white belts who you know on an open mat. uh stupid, right? Uh I don't say this to try to normalize it. It if anything, it should be the opposite, right? That's not good behavior. That's being silly. This is different than times I have gone out for example in competition where I still not an ego thing, right? I think people from the outside think that when someone goes unconscious, the idea is like he's like, "F you. I'm not giving you the the the satisfaction of getting me to submit, you know, consciously, right? That's never been the case for me. Usually, it's because I'm fighting so hard to escape that I've never acknowledged that idea that I could be finished, right? That I'm just going to get out, right? or that I mean that's usually the case for me like with the one time that's happened to me in competition was in 2007 uh 80C that would have been Newark or Bayon or whatever New Jersey weird spot for a world championship but um I got caught because he ended up getting a renegot choke and I remember The last thoughts in my head was how am I going to get the points back because he managed to get the hooks in. I wasn't even thinking about, oh, I'm about to go unconscious. Never even occurred to me. The only thing I was thinking about was how is I going to win, right? Uh, and I suspect most people who are getting put out in a competition scenario, that's probably what's going on, right? like they're just working so hard to try to escape. They've never even addressed the issue that they're about to be put to sleep. I think of course I I have a handful of times that I've tapped in competition. All of them chokes. So it's not like I won't tap to choke. I think is more that the circumstance like in my case this was a over double overtime situation 00 or it was a zero zero and uh you know I was in this fight at the time that I have tapped I knew I was caught immediately dead to rights like Salah Hero was one of the oh he was the second person to catch me in a submission and competition he locked me with a rear naked choke as well no hooks but it was super deep immediately completely and I saw the lights blacking out pretty fast when I was fighting it and I was already down t the match was almost over uh maybe like a minute left and I was down like I think uh two zero or something like that or maybe it was 4-0 I'm not sure but I know okay this is over uh I was fine tapping there right and even then I was upset that I tapped but that was because I was young and it was an ego thing I'm like ah you know, and I had a good, this is a good story in itself cuz I remember I tapped there and then I was upset with my I was talking to my brother. I'm like, man, I should have fought harder, you know, or if anything just gone out of my shield, right? And uh you know that thought kind of lingered in my head for a little bit and then later on in the tournament we're watching the finals go off and the women's final uh one of the women you know jumps a guillotine is in the closed guards cinching on. I look away for a second and then I look back and I just see a puddle underneath them and then the lady on the bottom who had this the guillotine starts freaking out. And I'm like, what happened here? Someone threw like a water bottle or And then I realized, oh no, no, the lady got choked unconscious and she pissed herself, right? Emptied her bowels. That's pretty embarrassing. So I'm like, you know, maybe the tap was better, right? I had to choose falling in a face first in my own piss or, you know, giving a little tappy. I'll give the little tap, right? I think that'll be fine. Uh yeah, that was pretty bad, you know. So I'm I'm glad the the fates showed me that because then I'm like, okay, yeah, let's not let's not be stupid with our ego, you know. But again, in training, I've been choked unconscious a couple times. And it's because you're fighting to the last minute. Now, in those situations that I tapped in training that they were like comp type roles, I thought I actually tapped and uh I think I just ran out of time. Uh I think those were two like bulldog jokes. Actually, my team in Miami has some killer bulldog jokes. And one of these guys got me in and I thought I had tapped and then I woke up and I'm like, "Oh man, what the hell happened?" I thought I I I gave up because in my head I was still rolling like I tapped them. Oh, good one. And then we kept going. So, uh again, not an endorsement of fighting it to the last minute, right? It's just I'm just telling you the reality of it. And I think it's important especially as a coach to recognize uh athletes who have that type of mindset. For example, like my brother whenever I was competing or training, he would know to watch me more carefully because he knew I would push it that far, right? And he hated that, you know, but it's just the way I was kind of wired mentally. That's the limits I was willing to go to, right? So these that that's kind of separate from the respect issue uh in a sense that I'm just trying to fight my hardest there versus the what I was talking about like the training mishap which is that I was goofing around and or not necessarily goofing around but not respecting a position enough and then getting in trouble as a result. Right? Uh so these are things you got to watch out for. Right? And again, I'm 43 years old and I've been doing the game for almost 30 years and I'm still making, you know, these silly judgment calls and mistakes. So, it happens to the best of people. I'm not saying I'm I'm one of those, but uh it can happen to anybody. So, I do this as a PSA, right? Like don't be silly like I was. And I think it's just a general good rule of thumb. Respect every submission, right? uh because if you don't then you're going to end up potentially looking up at the ceiling or worse face down the pool of your own you're in right not great the other hand of this respect issue that not giving respect also comes from underestimating opponents and I've had made this mistake a couple times fortunately I did it very early in my career so uh didn't affect me on a professional level and happened when I was wrestling I remember in high school it must have been summer because it was freestyle. And you know when you're wrestling in high school, freestyle tournaments, everybody has a singlets, wrestling shoes, wrestling head gear. That's standard, right? And when I went to get the first match of my tournament, my opponent came in with sneakers, uh, basketball shorts, and just a regular like white t-shirt. And I looked at him, I'm like, "Oh, this guy's going to get destroyed." you know, like he's obviously a scrub. Look how he's dressed. Like if he was a serious wrestler, he wouldn't be dressed like that, right? That was my like 15year-old intellect analyzing this book by its cover and then going into the match. And what ended up happening was I was like Ace Ventura thinking I was in a tank with a dolphin when it was a killer whale, right? Like the snowflake situation, right? because this guy threw me around all over the place, wiped the mat with me. And I'm not sure if it's because he was very like an amazing wrestler or just that I thought he was so bad that when he was actually halfway decent, it completely ruined my match because the one thing I can tell you, it's very hard to undo an underestimation. When you underestimate somebody, you basically created an idea of who this person is and what their capabilities are and uh what danger they they could pose to you in your head, which gives you this false sense of confidence and the idea that you can do certain things that and get away with it. And once reality hits and you're like, "Oh, actually this guy just forgot his gear at home and he's actually a really good wrestler, it's kind of too late now. It's hard to deconstruct what you created as the ego of this guy in your head and show the actual representation of it. It's a hard adjustment to make. And I've seen many athletes make this mistake where they underestimate an opponent based on press footage and they're like, "Oh, you know, this guy doesn't have any striking. I'm just going to walk in there and piece him up." And then lo and behold, from his last fight to this fight, he worked a lot of his striking and he got really good fast. And now you're in a problem. You created a whole game plan based on a person that doesn't exist. And you're fighting the guy that does exist that has a really good striking game. So, it's always important to respect anybody that gets in there with you as if they can't end your life because they can. Everybody who is brave enough to step into the ring, the cage, or step on to the mats is brave. Doesn't mean they're a killer, but they're brave. And if they're brave, that means they're brave enough to potentially end you, right? So underestimating somebody doesn't pose any benefit to you, right? There's nothing gained from being underprepared, right? You might say, "Oh, well, I didn't waste as much time or energy." Yeah, but then if you didn't waste the time and energy to prepare, then what were you doing? Not getting better. That's not good, right? So if anything, you want to I I don't say overestimation either. It really doesn't matter because as I've said before, when we're preparing for competition, the real competition is us, right? How much better am I going to come out? And how am I going to display my talents, my ability, my artistry, the best, right? The opponent is just a canvas that I'm going to paint on, so to speak, right? Uh it doesn't matter what version of him comes out. Of course, we want to have some awareness, like if I'm gonna fight uh Alex Pereira, I want to be sure I don't get caught with his hook. But I can't base my whole game plan off that, right? Because what happens if he decides not to throw that hook anymore? Now, my whole game plan is destroyed. And people do change, especially when they're getting studied heavily, right? So, um regardless of who's stepping in there with you, you should give them the utmost respect. that's only going to put you in a position where you're going to be more protected, right? Um, and we'll keep this short. I think two lessons on respect here. One, I would say always respect the submission. Even if you think it's weak, fight it like it's the hardest thing in the world. And be be prepared to tap, right? So you don't look like a jackass like I did. And then uh second, always respect anybody that's uh competing with you or stepping on the mats with you because even though you may have seen things or maybe you've trained with them in the past and they sucked and you thought you were so much better than them, things change, right? You can't judge a book by its cover. People can go undercover on you, you know, and just like that guy did, right? And he just forgot his gear at home probably, right? uh or maybe it's a tactic in itself to look like a dope and then come in there and be a superstar. It's not a bad strategy either. So, always respect anybody stepping in there. Again, that's going to protect you from having these type of issues where you're like, "Oh, what the hell I got into?" Right? Um and yeah, those are the two uh quick lessons on not giving respect. Like I said, uh these are mistakes I've made a few times. I don't want anybody else making these type of mistakes. And uh I mean, I've only paid a small price for it, right? Uh I don't want anybody paying a bigger price on that. Okay? And hopefully you don't have to pay any price because you just learn from this and be better than I was. All right? That's all I got for you guys this week. I see you all next